Boro did just enough in the last match to stay on the radar, though the blips are ominously sporadic. Finishing strongly in the last six matches is imperative, not just for chasing a mathematical mirage – also setting a firm foundation for a project looking set to miss a critical deadline…

Extended notes on the Watford affair:

Jones; Hoyte, Wheater, McManus, Taylor; Robson, O’Neil, Williams, Arca; Miller, Killen

• The notorious virus that put Hurworth on lockdown earlier this week beats its path through the non-playing participants of the traveling Boro party: Gary Gill is out – Craig Hignett in – and to prove the infection reaches far across the periphery of the official traveling party Eric Paylor is rendered below fitness for the trip down w/ AV – Tallentire has his gear packed and ready beside the bed

• On loan winger Jay O’Shea on the bench after limited training w/ his temporary teammates

• CG fondly recalls playing days w/ Martin Taylor – bizarrely also on loan from Brummie FC like our Irish winger – despite the recent reputation as a vile oaf he’s a real gentle giant – Tiny to his friends apparently…

• Quick start from the hosts – Tom Cleverley goes for accuracy over pace w/ his free kick – save B Jones inside of the first 2 minutes

• Boro don’t get going until the 13^th minute – off a cleared Watford corner GON romps forward cavalierly and shoots wide of Scott Loach’s target

• If Malky Mackay doesn’t get a job soon after he’s sacked maybe he can shill throat lozenges? The BBC Radio Tees effects microphones catch his every screeching shout

• Watford break through on 18 minutes: a corner was only half-cleared and it falls to former Boro man John Eustace – he volleys sweetly from the edge of the area past Jonesey and into the goal – Watford 1-0 Boro

• Blame Mark Drury for that goal implores CG – he was calling the goal scorer John Useless pre-match

• That goal was a bad augur: Watford unbeaten in 13 matches this campaign when they’ve opened the scoring – 10W 3D

• Alternatively we have the most losses from a 1-0 scoreline in the league…most wins from a 2-0 result too…what’s it all mean?

• Last team to beat Gareth Southgate? It was these Hornets a mere 4 days before Gaz – born in Watford! – got the sack

• An uneven performance from the referee Roger East so far, and probably not surprising given his ostensible geographical bias – 3 yellow cards for our lot – and a failure to send off Henri Lansbury for a rash of inappropriate fouls and tackles

• HT Watford 1-0 Boro – total rubbish so far

• CG opines: same old story for the Boro – punished by one or two lapses of judgment; lack of fluidity amongst the lumbering strike force and a lack of the final ball…their keep hasn’t done much; bring on LL to wreak havoc on this awful pitch…his pace can trouble their defenders and punish them for any sort of transgression

• Mark Drury reports that Gordo is cutting an increasingly frustrating figure on the bench -lambastes Mick and Killen for silly bookings – and laments being too lenient w/ the opponents so far…they’re there for the taking, insomuch as it was them who feared getting trousered early and succumbing the way we used to

• 2^nd half resumes w/ Leroy lurking on the sideline – his introduction finally occurs in the 50^th minute, replacing Lee Miller…why not just do it at half-time?

• Especially if he sparks the attack like this! His diligence deep in the Watford half earns a corner – and then moments later links well w/ Barry Robson to produce a pop on goal…

• And then he only goes and levels the effing match! LL scraps w/ Lloyd Doyley to win a 50-50 ball and plays it wide to GON – he chips a cross back towards goal and Leroy nods it home – Watford 1-1 Boro – 55 minutes

• That Henri Lansbury is a dirty little fucker – a spate of ruthless fouls that go largely unpunished until he finally copped a yellow card

• Last away win for Boro remains the 4-1 mauling @ Doncaster in January

• Horrendous surface at Vicarage Road – balls bobbling and forcing extra touches that’s slowing down any momentum – but both sides have to deal with it equally…no longer should an inferior surface be attributed to a poor and unacceptable performance

• Tom Cleverley has easily been the best player on the pitch…and he just absolutely whacked the crossbar!

• ‘A constant whirl of conversation’ on the touchline between the gaffers and fourth official

• 15 minutes left and it’s the first real spot of bother for Brad Jones: instead of securing a benign cross into his area it’s palmed out to Cleverley – Jonesey’s positioning saves him as he’s perfectly restricting a clear sight on goal

• Heidar Helguson springs to life in the final 10 minutes: the flag stays down as he latches onto a ball from the ubiquitous Cleverley and goes close; moments later David Wheater produces a superb block before the Icelandic striker can fire off a round

• Now a lack of shorts plagues us – apparently the fans saw a bit too much of Jonathan Franks as he came on for Julio Arca earlier…not only is he to occupy his place on the pitch, but his shorts too in a kit cock-up redolent of the trip to Peterborough
• Attendance: 14038 – well done to the 1132 away supporters who made the trek

• CG MOM: Mick

• FT Watford 1-1 Boro

A fair result overall…we defended well and really improved attack-wise after the break…Leroy Lita was really bright, maintaining a firm disposition full of endeavour and drive…hopefully the petulant transgressions of the recent past are history

Crystal Palace come Saturday to The Riverside…different agendas for sure, but desperate all the same…

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It was innocuous enough – our Arsenal supporting mate was keen to wring a prediction for the Tangerines visit. We rarely commit to a score, largely due to their disastrous repercussions, but had this to say:

• replication of the form from the weekend will do nicely…
• should be the same side, though I reckon Johnno’s class has to be included if he’s ready to play + GON and Rhys Williams picked up minor knocks v QPR…
• gotta get the home form sorted – Blackpool play some nice passing football, but they’re atrocious away from Bloomfield Road and I fully expect them to ultimately park the bus…

Partial credit on the last bit. Ian Holloway had his team play some of that nice passing football – and Boro weren’t terribly interested in stopping the surges. Two goals in a five minute span from Gary Taylor-Fletcher gifted an insurmountable lead and those in attendance unleashed hell on the product served up to them. Holloway also conceded that he actually banked on the Riverside crowd spooking their side, allowing his charges to command the contest.

What is the solution? That’s the big ask. Gordon Strachan has been refreshingly frank – we don’t need more propaganda, we are patient, and the derision is fully warranted.

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Fucking Newcastle keep winning – their perpetual off-season turmoil may have actually helped galvanise the squad. The personnel embargo limited the movement of potential assets like Kevin Nolan, Steve Harper, Jonas Gutierrez, and Andy Carroll. Throw in the extra grit of Alan Smith, Joey Barton, Danny Guthrie, the wise permanent appointment of caretaker Chris Hughton, and it’s not exactly shocking that the Toon have organised effectively and made short work of their new league thus far. The Geordies have been largely injury-free – it needs to stay that way if they wish to continue their rapid ascent back to the top flight.

Peterborough are convinced Mark Cooper is their man to mount next seasons Championship promotion push. The managing prodigy leaves his post at Conference side Kettering Town to fill the vacancy caused by the divorce between silver-spooned Darren Ferguson and Darragh MacAnthony’s plaything, who for a rich bloke has a shit Wikipedia page… The real estate magnate’s puppets are convinced SAF junior has another gig lined up, in no way influenced by his familial connections, possibly to change the bigarade hue that has ensconced greater Hull for the past 3 years.

Paolo Sousa is devilishly handsome. And he backed Boro for promotion after receiving a 3-0 thrashing from the Teessiders in round 2. We naturally love him, if only because he adequately fills the Mourinho-shaped void in English football. The Jacks own the stingiest defence in the division, and are now unbeaten in 10 straight, elevating to 9^th in the table.

And hasn’t Ian Holloway heard that junk shop clothes will get you nowhere? He was convicted by the Blackpool kangaroo court for either not being punctual, or misplacing his kit, or both? He trudged off to the charity shop for a £12.99 suit to wear for the 4-1 thrashing of schizophrenic Scunthorpe. Speaking of misplacing, seems Robbie Savage has some explaining to do…why show up for an international flight w/ the passport of your missus? Is it a devious murder for hire subplot on the lurid level of Nip/Tuck, or just an honest cock-up expected of a gypsy oaf? He won’t get back on the        flight deck w/ that behaviour…

The league is on hiatus until next Friday – Swansea v Derby to kick off round 17 – we’ll return next week to summarise Boro/Forest, and the rest of the notable and entertaining…

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Nickname(s): The Pilgrims, The Greens, Argyle

Ground: Home Park

From Boro: 380 miles…long and tiring, irrespective of the transportation…Amsterdam is closer for fuck’s sake!!

Kit: the adidas influence is highly noticeable…nice though

Ignominy: Plymouth is the largest city in England to have never participated in top flight football – Hull City’s promotion in 2007-08, and subsequent consolidation, put paid to that…

Pilgrim Messiah: Paul Sturrock…he returned to Home Park 27 Nov 2007 for a return engagement after Ian Holloway defected to Leicester; his first spell from 2000 saw Argyle avoid Football League relegation, ultimately steering them to the Second Division before scuttling to Southampton

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