Boro makes two changes from Palace: Steele, McMahon, Hines, Grounds, Bennett, Robson (c), Bailey, Arca, McDonald, Emnes, Lita. Subs: Ripley, Haas, Zemmama, Boyd, Halliday, Franks, Smallwood.

1^st half

• Barry Robson makes his return after a nasty leg injury, captaining the side in the absence of Matthew Bates
• @higs8 in for Gary Gill in the expert summariser role
• Boro have sent out an unnamed side only once in 72 matches. That is absolutely stultifying, stretching back to manager who oversaw the freefall that’s brought us here
• Referee: Robert Madley (West Yorkshire)
• Swansea did their last double over Boro way back in 1925. Higgy seizes the opportunity to ask Ali if he remembers doing those games. That’s a smart and easy way to bed in as a broadcast deputy
• £500,000 paid for the peripatetic Scott Sinclair represents some great business by Huw Jenkins. The outlay has netted 17 goals overall this term
• Marvin Emnes, Swansea Tormentor! 8 minutes in he puts Swansea under the cosh – it’s a neat turn and finish to a chance created by Leroy Lita…Boro 1-0 Swansea
• After the goal Mogga continues to implore his charges to pressurise the Swansea defenders
• Julio Arca still dealing with the foot stamp from Palace…picks up a knock in the same area here, but he appears good to continue
• Another week, another horrific mistake from Seb Hines, this time attempting to dribble the ball across the defence. Nathan Dyer is on hand to capitalise and get Swansea level after a whole six minutes after Boro score
• Leon Britton back as the metronome in the Swans midfield after his Sheff Utd nightmare
• If we are deficient in leadership in the heart of defence why don’t we turn to the Haas? A Bayern captain, even if it’s the B team, is still surely good enough for the current fight?
• This match will be decided by whoever terrorizes the others shaky defence more
• Good link up Emnes and Lita…the latter’s acrid touch killed the move after a decent surge up the field
• Jonathan Grounds opens his senior Boro account – a powerful header from a Robbo free kick…David Who? Boro 2-1 Swansea
• The chance for an unassailable half time lead is cleared off the line; Seb Hines was forward, looping a header destined for goal…3 goals in the first 45 minutes could have shattered this Swans defence

HT Boro 2-1 Swansea

Swansea are behind for not taking their chances – Luke Moore, of all people, hasn’t been his usual assertive-against-Boro self. Maybe he’s just a Prem level bête noir?

Boro flagrantly need to tighten up the defence; Hines has had another shocker so far, refusing to impose himself and be a physical force. Going forward we’ve been bright and effective. Leroy Lita should have scored earlier after Emnes set him up. Substitute ‘Emnes’ for anyone else and you have a line suitable for any Boro match report

Apart from the scoreline, there may not be much to shout about. Swans playing with their usual cavalier, no-fear approach, highlighted by their hypnotic passing

2^nd half

• No changes for either side – surely Zemmama and Haas will get consideration for the second half
• Pratley, Gower, Britton have been a force for Swans. Just as we finished reviewing that statement Brendan Rodgers registered his disapproval by taking off Pratley and Britton. Balls
• Angel Rangel tangle? Oh Higgy!!
• Lethal Leroy Lita!! Barry Robson again with a quality ball into the box…easy header to finish – no mistake…Boro 3-1 Swans
• Attendance: 14825 (267 Swans)
• Swans pull one back from the spot – needless push by Arca on Joe Allen…Scott Sinclair converts to make it Boro 3-2 Swansea
• Seb Hines continues to have a shocker…another poor goal conceded whilst we were temporarily down to 10 men. Ashley Williams nods it home while Joe Bennett waits for clearance to return from the sideline…Boro 3-3 Swans
• If there is any consolation from our 3 awful conceded goals, it’s that Swansea are just as dire and unsure at the back
• Merouane Zemmama – wearing number 5 – and Jonathan Franks now up front after Lita and Scott McDonald exit. Diminutive.
• Harsh challenge Mark Gower on Julio Arca, eliciting a yellow. Could have been another colour rightfully
• Richie Smallwood – who Mogga thinks the world of – comes on for a wounded Arca
• Craig Beattie nets an unbelievable winner that stupefies everybody except the 267 away supporters…Boro have thrown away a 3-1 advantage at home and got fuck all from this match

Higgy MOM – Grounds

FT Boro 3-4 Swansea

Sickening finish. Boro score 3 at home and conspire to lose – shocking defending all around today. Swansea were just as jittery, but we couldn’t punish them sufficiently. Serious questions about Hines now. Jason Steele too…

Tunnel reaction with Tony Mowbray: can’t say a lot really – disappointing for the fans – our defending is indefensible – couldn’t stop the ball from going in the net – Whetaer and Bates a few weeks ago, now this – obviously should’va had the 3 points today…need to continue looking over our shoulders – ‘we will improve,  I’m sure’

Barry Robson, commendably honest: scored some good goals when up 3-1; the last 20 mins was diabolical – it’s not just the defence, the rest of the team, collectively, needs to pitch in – we can match the top teams, just needs to be on a more consistent basis – as a team, we need to learn to calm down and get back into it – we played good football, exciting stuff at times – ‘at 3-1, the game should be out of sight’

Boro employ a fluid 4-4-2: Steele, McMahon, Hines, Bates, Bennett, Bailey, Arca, Taylor, Emnes, Lita, Boyd – Subs: Ripley, Haas, Grounds, Smallwood, Park, McDonald, Franks

11 academy players in the squad, rendering it easier to name the foreigners: Bailey, Arca, Haas, McDonald, Lita, Boyd, Emnes

Maximilian Haas has been allocated squad number 3

Having a listen to Mogga’s pre-match with Ali. He describes Richie Smallwood as a pragmatic footballer. Perhaps the best bit of January business was inking the young talent to new long term deals – Smallwood, Joe Bennett, and Seb Hines are in on the ground level of this renaissance

1^st half

• Extremely low crowd in this unfashionable midweek fixture – only two coaches full of Scunny support, and they’re only about 90 minutes away

• Ref: Rob Lewis (Shrewsbury) – this is his Championship bow. Does this mean we can harshly scrutinise his performance and infer he doesn’t know the laws of the game?

• Early clanger for Matthew Bates – after some panic it’s determined he just needs some tissues stuffed up his nostrils

• Kris Boyd, still around after a series of transfer dominoes failed to fall fortuitously, makes an early mark in the match, just like at Glanford Park – an easy ball over the top from Seb Hines leads to a decent finish past a hapless defence…7 mins in and Boro lead 1-0

• Boro lead the recent series 9W 4D 4L – Scunny haven’t won on Teesside since November 1961

• Woeful defending on display by the visitors. Keeper Joe Murphy remains out with an ankle injury, so Josh Lillis – himself the lad of former Iron player and assistant manager Mark Lillis – is tasked with organising this ragtag bunch

• Mogga looks for a spark and a bit of conviction – Taylor and Emnes are ordered to switch their roles on the flanks to make something, anything, productive happen

• Feliz Cumpleanos (tardio!) Julio Arca, who turned 30 yesterday

• Average so far – limited cohesion and concentration – fortunate to be ahead

• Come on and take these corners/free kicks short…be crafty Mogga

• Scunthorpe: 6 away wins this term, which is a smashing return. It’s their home form that’s abandoned them and consigned them to the relegation zone

HT Boro 1-0 Scunthorpe

Much better end to the first stanza, marked by more chances, improved passing, and better attacking intent. The forwards need to ‘liven up’, and they are not the only ones to draw a scornful eye from the Boro technical area.

2^nd half

• It’s the first shot across the bow this half – Julio Arca goes very close with an expert free kick, past a rooted Josh Lillis – great work Tony McMahon to earn the attacking opportunity

• Following the script: Ahead by a slim margin. Dominating the second half. Now what – kill the fucking game like a group of professionals, or bottle it?

• The bench asks it too – where’s the second goal? McMahon and Bennett are the only reliable attacking outlets

• Attendance -14364 (265 Scunny)

• Penna awarded! Then 6 Scunthorpe players mob the referee and force a consultation with the linesman who overturns it. Leroy Lita goes in the book for being ‘over-theatrical’

• Tony McMahon blows kisses to the crowd! It’s a killer free kick that takes a solitary hop on its way in, and Boro have some breathing room…this can be a propelling result

• Abdisalam Ibrahim is sent off – he accrues two harsh bookings to prompt an alacritous red card from the rookie ref

• Last time Scunthorpe came to the Riverside they finished w/ 10 men, harshly (Cliff Byrne the offender), and Leroy Lita was sent off for ‘petulance’ after decking an opponent…LL is on a yellow currently after the reversed penalty decision

• Scunthorpe enduring a wretched run – 1 win in their last 11 league matches

• Cameron Park receives another late cameo – it’s a home debut this time round

• 5 mins added

• Julio Arca pulls rank on the youngsters as he commands the free kick he earned – his effort is top notch, just missing the crossbar in a quest for the third goal

GG MOM – Tony McMahon

FT Boro 2-0 Scunthorpe

Nicky Bailey was excellent again – this is nine or ten matches on the spin where he’s been a masterful technician. The full backs were outstanding, often providing the best attacking options. There’s no underestimating how psychologically important the clean sheet is when factoring recent, and historical, transgressions. In the end it’s a satisfying result.

Tunnel reaction with Tony Mowbray: two goal advantage takes the sting out of the opposition – in the end it was relatively comfortable – disappointed at half time…played poorly for the first time in a long time, couldn’t string together passes and execute moves – have to continue believing in Kris Boyd to help him score goals – no matter who claims the second goal; the win is the only thing – Tony Macca was ’exceptionally good’ – the result is all the more important given the future visits of Swansea and QPR

Tony McMahon tells his mates ‘I’ll ring you back’ so he can chat about the match: the goal was his, full stop – Leroy Lita continued the stick after the final whistle, adamant that he got the slightest of touches on the wondrous free kick – gaffer constantly encourages the full backs to press forward

Final thoughts from Seb Hines: really good performance in the second half – trying to take the opportunity he waited so long for, even with an imported centre back now lurking over his shoulder – the underlying aim is to win; send a statement to every club in the division

Boro have another crisis to negotiate while preparing for the holiday programme, this of a defensive nature. Sean St Ledger is back with Preston, unofficially, on gardening leave until his loan deal becomes permanent come January. Speculation abounds though as to the status of that deal – recent reports highlight an alleged row between defender and gaffer that has the full Ireland international defender cogitating over the impending permanence of his move. Virtual trudging has helped deduce that said row may have been blown out of proportion and that Gordo has designs on converting SSL to right back in the coming new year to help re-shape the squad. Additionally Seb Hines, who was pretty efficient in performing a partnership w/ David Wheater prior to acquiring SSL, suffered gruesome knee damage on reserve duty in the midweek and is out for up to 8 weeks. Expect Emanuel Pogatetz to occupy the central defence w/ Wheats and the recall of Andrew Taylor at left back. The caterwauling for Joe Bennett and/or Jonathan Grounds remains neglected.

Elsewhere in the projected squad: Gary O’Neil has been declared fit to retain the captaincy and return to his role in the Boro engine room; Adam Johnson is out after injury v Cardiff, so Mark Yeates, on a run of 3 consecutive excellent shifts, will marshal the left flank; Julio Arca may feature on the right side – not because he’s really excelled mind, it’s just the paucity of attacking options; and the Kitson/Lita reunion tour is about to reach its climax, so how about one last duet in the intimate surroundings of St. James’ Park?

(patterned on the squad for Bristol City)

Danny Coyne – no longer, if ever, relevant for Wales…16 senior caps since 1996

Tony McMahon – no England activity apart from U-17, U-18 levels

David Wheater – his star has faded recently, but the Redcar Rock will surely resurface after garnering Fabio Capello’s attention – 3 total call-ups, twice named a substitute for friendlies v France and Trinidad & Tobago

Jonathan Grounds – no tangible English experience…still making a name for himself, admirably, at club level

Andrew Taylor – an England U-21 stalwart, which is surprising cos he rarely impresses in our shirt

Mark Yeates – yet to make an imprint for Ireland, who seem overpopulated w/ likeable midfield grafters and scamps who can’t quite sustain the desired quality and class

Adam Johnson – destined to break w/ the next wave of English regulars – he may succeed where his predecessor didn’t: making the left wing of England his alone

Rhys Williams – national ambivalence saw the young starlet turn out for Wales at youth levels, only to oscillate back to his country of birth, Australia…part of the extended squad selected for the Socceroos successful World Cup qualifying campaign

Julio Arca – only repatriation to a neophyte nation could resuscitate a long dead international career

Leroy Lita – impressed at the 2007 U-21 European Championships for England – botched a notable penalty v Czech Republic early in the competition, but registered goals in the next three contests…named to the UEFA Dream Team for the event

Marvin Emnes – excelled in limited duty for the Holland U-17s…now featuring for the U-21s…scored a brace during a friendly earlier this year in a friendly we embarrassingly cannot locate

Substitutes – Jason Steele will keep goal for England seniors eventually; Justin Hoyte had his run at England U-21 level; Seb Hines may want to invoke his American eligibility to assure glory for country; Josh Walker, Joe Bennett and Jonathan Franks are still nascent to the English scene; et Jeremie Aliadiere…vitesse supérieure non française